Are Your Goals and Value In Line

S/When your goals and values are not in line, it’s as if you have two horses pulling you in opposite directions. Let me explain.

Most people agree that goals can basically be described as what you are striving for and making plans to achieve. They are your objectives: Your aim. While values are those things that are important or significant to you. Goals often seem to be more easily measurable than values.

Ideally you want your top 5 or so goals to be in line with your top 5 or so values. The significance may not seem apparent at first, but let me share Bobbie Roberts’ story.

 

Case Study: Bobbie’s Goals & Values

After attending a workshop I taught, Bobbie came to me and said she loved her job, but for some reason achieving her career goals seemed to be a real struggle lately.

I proceeded to inquire about Bobbie’s goals, learning she had recently revamped her career goals. They were now very clear and defined. The top three were to expand her sales territory, increase her income and become a trainer for new sales people with the company.

Next, I asked Bobbie about her values. She responded by looking at me as if I had just spoken a foreign language. I explained to Bobbie that values were those often intangible things that are important to us. Being a religious and family oriented woman, Bobbie quickly and confidently stated her top three values were her relationships with her husband, her children and God.

Then, it was time for Bobbie to share what she was doing to realize her goals.

She reported she was traveling more. That she was out of town frequently, as much as 4 days a week, sometimes on the week-ends. This meant sometimes missing mass on Sunday, her son’s ball games on Saturdays and more. Aha, I thought, we are on to something here. And I bet you can already see at least part of the problem, just as Bobbie did.

Bobbie’s goals were not being supported by her values. In fact Bobbie’s goals were leading her away from what she valued.

Recognizing this actually made the solution fairly simple.

Bobbie rearranged her schedule to take into account her values. She was no longer away from home on the week-ends. No more missed Saturday ball games and Sunday services. And when Bobbie was away, she and her husband had pre-arranged times for phones calls and such.

 

Values Change

Values will change as you go through life.

For instance as a teen you may find that traveling, having a spouse, or variety in your life are not in your top 10 values. But rather friends, status and independence are. Ask the same person when they are 35 years old, married and a parent and you will likely find two of their top ten values will include their marriage and their children.

You will also find your values can easily change based on the circumstances. For example, if you are not feeling physically well, how much you value your health can’t help but increase. Or, if your job is in jeopardy, you might find that you value money and security more than you had in the past. This is also true when marriages are in crisis.

As you can see, when your goals and values are not in line they cause mixed emotions.

These conflicts can create difficulties in making the best choices and can also lead to exhaustion. Yet if your goals and values are in line, supporting each other, positive emotions are triggered. This simplifies and clarifies things at the very least.

Below is a partial list of the 100 values that I have recognized by querying my workshop participants and in working one to one with clients. They are in no particular order.

 

Tip: If you have difficulty organizing your goals and values, try starting with just a few. Put them in order, pick another and insert it into the hierarchy where you feel it belongs. Continue, until complete. Share your thoughts below. Or you can start by sorting them into three piles of Most, Least and Moderate importance.

 

______  Security/Safety
______  Family/Friends
______  Marriage/Significant other
______  Status/Recognition
______  Health/Fitness
______  Happiness/Content
______  Variety/Diversity
______  Recognition/Praise
______  Wealth/Money
______  Free Time/Leisure
______  Sports/Athletics
______  Long Life/Old Age
______  Freedom/Independance
______  Courage/Bravery
______  Religion /Spirituality
______  Wonder/Awe
______  Growth/Developement
______  Independence
______  Achievement/Success
______  Education/Learning
______  Creativity/Imagination
______  Meaning/Fullfillment
______  Travel/adventure
______  Contribution/Charity
______  Meaningful job/Career
______  Other ______________
______  Other ______________

Take as much time as you need to determine your top 10 values and your least important values. Please share below your thoughts, comments or even your top three values.

Enjoy the journey,