5 Assumptions That Couples SHOULD Make About Marital Problems

We’ve all heard what “assume” does to you and me, but there are certain times when it’s good to make assumptions.

When assumptions smooth relationships and make life better, then they actually serve us. When assumptions harm relationships, they don’t.

With this in mind, let’s look at some awesome assumptions that will save your marriage some grief.

1.  All couples have problems.

Yes, all couples have disagreements and challenges, even those that seem perfect from an outside point of view.

It is not “if” you will have problems or disagreements, but rather “when” you have problems and “how” you address them.

Knowing that, don’t be quick to judge either your mate or yourself. Human beings have conflicts from time to time. Just assume that it’s normal for all people, and quite forgivable.

2. Solving marital problems fast may not be the best approach.

When there is a challenge or problem in a marriage, one or both of the partners will likely feel an urgency to “solve” the problem right away. Women tend to want to talk about the problem longer, while men tend to want to take action and solve it quickly.

There are times when it’s best to delay rushing to an instant resolution, because one party might not feel completely comfortable with the “solution.”

Take some time and ego strength to truly understand the problem before pronouncing it solved. Understand that other people don’t resolve problems in the same style you do. So ask questions and be sensitive to the feelings of the other.

3. Healthy couples take a partnership approach to solving their problems.

Solving problems together helps to keep the focus on solutions and highlights the very partnership of marriage.

If one person strikes out alone, or if you each try to act alone, you rob yourselves of a unique opportunity to learn about the other person and grow together.

Bear in mind that your relationship is only as healthy as the weakest partner, so resist the temptation of pushing through your point of view against all objections. It doesn’t benefit you in the long run.

4. Wise couples understand that there will be differences and struggles, so they come up with a game plan for dealing with differences.

The best way to solve problems is to start before the problems arise. Smart couples will tell you that it’s good to have a healthy plan for resolving problems.

For example, have a set time to talk or talk while walking together. And agree to avoid discussing problems with others around.

The final objective is to resolve something with the person you love, not to prove that you were right and your partner was wrong.

5. Strong couples don’t make mountains out of molehills.

Some folks will fight long and hard for mere scraps. These couples have a strong attachment to being “right” and tend to stay in a state of ego battles instead of mutual appreciation.

Strong couples know when to cut losses and focus on being happy as opposed to being right. Every battle doesn’t have to escalate to war.

Because no two people in this world agree on everything, you’re going to have different opinions and approaches to life.

Find ways to resolve issues without making either of you “wrong.” After all, you both led unique lives, and you may have drawn different conclusions along the way.

Solve your problems with love and humanity. In the long run, you’ll be glad you did.

Happy problem solving my friend,