Growing up, I was a bit of a tomboy and I’m still a big sports fan. We actually turn the draft into a festivity in my house, and my sons love it! Perhaps the sports fan in me is why I enjoy a little fun and friendly competition or challenge. My Pinterest workout board has a ton of those 30 day squat, ab, cardio, breathing, stretching, whatever challenges (never mind all the dessert recipes on my food board too hehe).
Whether you typically enjoy challenges or not, I have one that you and your mate might actually find pretty worthwhile. It’s called Sexy September.
Known to some as Naughty November, Sexy September is the challenge to have sex with your mate everyday for the entire month of September. Yep, thirty days has September and that means thirty days of physical intimacy (I’m hoping you’re smiling about that rather than feeling intimidated by it).
5 Reasons to Participate in Sexy September
While I believe there are millions of reasons for upping your sex life, I’ve narrowed down five of my favorites. They might just persuade you to join the Sexy September challenge.
1. Rekindles passion and romance.
Research shows that having sex more often can actually increase sex drive and libido levels in some people. That means, the more sex you have, the more you want! So as the Sexy September challenge comes to an end, you may notice that you and your mate have a greater desire for each other and physical intimacy together (woo hoo).
Additionally, having sex more frequently can assist in increasing sexual stamina. Look at it like training for a marathon. Increasing the frequency of sex literally reignites burnt out flames. Be prepared for the heat!
2. Chances to try new things.
Thirty days of sex is thirty opportunities to revisit those honeymoon days and do a little experimenting. Go wild. Change up locations. Kitchen. Garage. Floor. Wherever. I actually had clients who went to the garage and had sex in the back of their car just to cross something off their bucket lists.
Experiment with various positions (and toys if so feel led to). Your marital bed is a land of freedom for enjoying one another’s bodies and pleasuring one another however you desire. Always be respectful about one another’s feelings on sexual acts and be considerate of what you’re both comfortable with.
To keep it fresh over the thirty days and to have a little additional fun and excitement, consider putting thirty ideas or requests in a hat and draw one out every day. Take turns each day picking an idea. It’ll seem like a daily reward or treat for you two – like a love making lottery (yes, please)!
3. Forces you to reprioritize time with your spouse.
Knowing you’re going to be intimate every single day of the month guarantees one on one time with your mate every day too. For the busy couple who lets work, kids, and other obligations take a higher place over their mate, this guaranteed time can help reprioritize your spouse.
While the idea of scheduled sex may seem unromantic to some, there’s something wonderfully safe and comforting about knowing you will definitely get some alone time with your mate today.
Some of my clients reported feeling excited at work knowing they had another day of Sexy September to look forward to – that it put them in a better mood and helped the work day go by more easily. Others reported less arguments because they were in better moods and spent more time communicating after sex.
4. Sex is bonding in a marriage.
Sex releases oxytocin – known as the “bonding” hormone. It’s the same hormone released by nursing mothers to help bond them to their infant children. That means when you and your mate have sex, there is a chemical reaction that helps to bond you to one another.
Remember in the bible the whole “two become one” thing – it’s literally happening as you bond through this chemical reaction. This bonding scientifically makes you closer to one another and happier as a couple. How cool is that?!?
5. Sex is a great stress reliever.
Orgasms release endorphins which make you feel happy. Endorphins also help relieve headaches and pain. (So, no using “I have a headache” as an excuse – sex will help the headache!) Skip the tylenol and jump into bed for treatment 😉
Plus, the physical exertion also counts as a workout (best cardio ever!). Sex even helps you sleep better at night. I worked with a couple who swore sex was better than melatonin when they were struggling to go to sleep (a totally different form of tossing and turning wink-wink).
A Word of Encouragement
Thirty days is a commitment, but you, your mate, and your marriage are worth it! Take this challenge seriously and do not skip days. I know you’ll be tired. I know you have kids. I know you “just did it yesterday!” BUT, fix your mind on fulfilling this challenge and enjoy the results of it. This is not to be a chore but an intentional time of improving your marital relationship.
Of course, if someone gets sick or injured, you should be respectful of your mate. Cuddling, spooning, or a back/foot rub could serve as a substitute on this day. It’s still physical touch and very romantic.
Have you and your mate ever participated in this type of challenge or something similar? What kind of growth did you see in your marriage as a result? Were you able to see it through for the whole month? What would you advise the couple who is taking on the Sexy September Challenge?
Challenge Accepted,
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